“Is ‘candlewax’ one word or two?”

“One, I think. I don’t know. Look it up.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“Now that’s an insensitive question.”

“How so?”

“You know.”

“No, I really don’t. I’m fast, not psychic. Now why can’t you look it up.”

“Electronics don’t work for me. My magnetism shuts them off.”


“What do you mean, and?”

“Why does that mean you can’t look it up?”

“Why—? Oooo you are so insensitive!”

“What do electronics have to do with looking up a word?!”

How am I supposed to look up a word if I can’t turn on the computer?!

“…You are so clueless.”

“You’re a jerk.”

“For someone who can’t use electronics, you are strangely oblivious to the concept of books.


“And we’re trapped in a library.


“You’re writing with a pencil right now—

“I get it, already! Sorry! Sheesh!”

“We’re never getting out of here. I’m going to die by the hands of a megalomaniacal wax-based bibliophile with a partner who doesn’t know that dictionaries preexist the digital age.”

“I can’t believe you have that big a vocabulary but don’t know if ‘candlewax’ is one word or two.”

“Shut up.”

“Stop whining, I’m almost finished. Flux will read this and get us out of here no matter what happens, you wait and see.”

“Great. Awesome. Then he can take me back in time so we never have this mind-numbing conversation. Get on with it and stop worrying about your grammar.”


“Thank you.”

“……How do you spell ‘infuriating’?”

“SON of a—”

(A/N: You can read all of my posted short stories by clicking “Writing Shorts” in the Menu. Thanks for reading!)

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